The Office has been off the air for years now but there is no shortage of great scenes to duplicate. One of those scenes is Kevin Malone dropping an entire pot of chili on the office floor and trying to salvage as much as he could.
First grab yourself a bald cap or shave your head. You might be able trim off some hairs from a wig to recreate Kevin’s balding look in a pinch.
- Karlery Short Curly Fits Old Man Bald Cap
- Miss U Hair Short Black Bald Cap Wig Mens Wigs
- Balding Wig, Brown Adult HM-461A
- Fun World Comb Over Wig
- HPO Adult Men’s Brown Balding Friar Father Wig
Next thing you need is a white dress shirt.
- Van Heusen Men’s Dress Shirt Regular Fit Poplin Solid
- Kenneth Cole Unlisted Men’s Dress Shirt Regular Fit Solid
- Kenneth Cole Unlisted Men’s Dress Shirt Slim Fit Solid
Slip on a tie.
- RBOCOTT Silk Stripe Plaid Tie and Pocket Square with Tie Clip Sets for Men
- Dubulle Mens Tie Sets Woven Paisley Stripes
- Dubulle Mens Tie Set Solid Paisley Necktie
Grab yourself a brown suit jacket/blazer and some brown pants. Color probably doesn’t matter too much. Make sure to check your local thrift store first!
- PJ PAUL JONES Men’s Suede Leather Blazer Jacket
- Men Casual Corduroy Blazer Jacket Slim Fit Two-Button Sport Coat
- Haggar Men’s ECLO Stria Expandable-Waist Plain-Front Dress Pant
- Haggar Men’s Cool 18 Stria Hidden Expandable Waistband Plain Front Pant
- IZOD Men’s American Chino Flat Front Straight Fit Pant
- Cloudstyle Men’s Suit Single-Breasted One Button Center Vent 2 Pieces Slim Fit Formal Suits
- P&L Men’s Premium Slim Fit 2-Piece Business Wedding Prom Suit Jacket Blazer Tux & Flat Pants Set
Throw on any pair of shoes you own. If you’re feeling cheeky you can slip on a pair of tissue boxes.
- Skechers Men’s Nampa-Groton Food Service Shoe
- Deer Stags Men’s Greenpoint
- Scotties Everyday Comfort Facial Tissues, 92 Tissues per Box, 92 Count (Pack of 4)
Don’t forget the blue oven mitts.
- ANYI Oven Mitts Professional Heat Resistance Kitchen Oven Soft Cotton Gloves
- Big Red House Heat-Resistant Oven Mitts – Set of 2 Silicone Kitchen Oven Mitt Gloves, Dark Royal Blue
- KitchenAid Asteroid Cotton Oven Mitts with Silicone Grip
You’ll definitely want to grab yourself a stock pot.
- IMUSA USA Stainless Steel Stock Pot with Lid 16-Quart, Silver
- MUSA USA Stainless Steel Stock Pot 20-Quart, Silver
- Stainless Steel Cookware Stock Pot – 12.5 Quart, Food Grade Heavy Duty Induction Pot
If you really want to get into it you can cook the chili using the recipe used by Kevin. It’s hidden in the Peacock terms of service.
In case they decide to update their TOS here’s the recipe:
4 dried ancho chiles
2 Tbs neutral oil (vegetable, canola or grapeseed)
3 lbs ground beef (80/20 or 85/15 lean)
2 medium yellow onions, finely chopped
6 cloves garlic
1 large jalapeño, finely chopped
1 Tbs dried oregano
2 tsp ground cumin
¼ tsp cayenne pepper
2 Tbs tomato paste
2 12 oz. bottles of beer (lager or pale ale)
3 cans Pinto beans, drained and rinsed
3 cups beef stock
2 ½ cups chopped ripe tomatoes
2 Tbs kosher salt
Chopped scallions, shredded Jack cheese and sour cream for topping
– Tear ancho chiles into pieces, discarding seeds and stems. In a large heavy pot or Dutch oven, toast chiles over medium-high, stirring occasionally until very fragrant, 3 to 4 minutes. Transfer toasted ancho chiles to a food processor or spice mill and process until very finely ground. Set aside.
– Add oil to pot and heat over medium-high. Add ground beef and cook, stirring occasionally to break beef into small pieces, until well browned (about 6 minutes). Using a slotted spoon, transfer beef to a plate and set aside.
– Add onion to pot and cook briefly over medium-high until barely softened, about 2 minutes. The secret is to undercook the onions.
– Using a garlic press, press garlic directly into the pot, 1 clove at a time. Then stir in jalapeños, oregano, cumin, cayenne pepper and tomato paste. Stir and cook until fragrant, about 2 minutes. Add beer and continue to cook, stirring and scraping the pan, about 7 minutes.
– Meanwhile, put beans in a large bowl and mash briefly with a potato masher until broken up but not fully mashed.
– Add mashed beans, stock, tomatoes, salt, and cooked beef to pot. Cover and bring to a simmer. Reduce heat to low to maintain simmer and cook 2 hours so everything gets to know each other in the pot. Remove from heat, uncover and let stand at least 1 hour (can also be refrigerated 8 hours or overnight).
– Reheat gently, taste and add more salt if necessary, and serve with your favorite toppings. We recommend chopped scallions, shredded Jack cheese and sour cream.
Enjoy! While we wish you could dish us up a bowlful (without spilling it all over our reception area, naturally), feel free to share this recipe (tagging @peacocktv, of course). And now, back to your regularly scheduled legal document.
With everything put together you’ve got yourself a Kevin Malone chili costume.